Monday, November 08, 2004

Things I Learned in the First Trimester

I've graduated. I'm moving on!

So, what did I learn in the first few months of pregnancy?

1. Being pregnant is pretty awful feeling. Yes, it is also fascinating in a science experiment sort of way...but the truth is, there really is no apparent external sign of the alleged child that is on it's way...you just feel pretty crummy for weeks on end.
2. I'm tempering other women's experience through a new "pregnancy" filter. So, when women tell me, "Oh you will feel GREAT during your second trimester!" I'm begining to understand that this is relative. You don't feel GREAT in a pre-pregnancy sort of way. You just feel better than the horror that has been your waking moments for the past couple of months.
3. No. You truly have never been constipated before. Trust me on this. There is constipated, and then there is "I'm pregnant and I can't take a shit" constipated.
4. Tylenol is SFA.
5. Time seems to be crawling along, whilst moving at hyper-forward speed all at once. In one moment I'll think "boring, I'm ready to see a lump or something" and in the next moment I'm thinking "whoa, slow this down, I don't know if I'll be ready for this in time."
6. Baby gear is huge, space sucking in its hulk. We bought a stroller this weekend and it GIAGANTIC. And scary. And, so REAL.

and most ENORMOUSLY of all:
7. Your pre-pregn ancy self is well and truly gone forever. Already. Not that you should lay down and weep and mourn it, it is just that you are now a different you. From now on you make every decision (from what you put into your mouth, to health insurance, to consumer purchases, to even slowly changing your current schedule in hopes of making that transition in May a bit easier) with a different set of criteria than before. You think about how your vote in a national election could possibly affect the life of your child. You think about things like schools (well, especially in our case as we've already decided that we do not our kid to go to school in this country) and where you want to be living in five years time when school becomes an issue. Your entire context has shifted and, really, it's ok...it's just different and weird and, well, just absolutely no longer who you used to be.

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